We all know the story of Hansel and Gretel. Two innocent children were walking in the woods and found a house made of candy. Inside was an ugly old witch trying to make a cake out of it. Well, that's only one side of the story. I'm here to tell you what really happened. Let's make one thing clear right away; I wasn't an ugly old witch. My name was Bertha. He also really hurt my feelings and added to my insecurities when he said I was an ugly old hag. I thought I was a beautiful middle-aged woman. And I wasn't a “witch”; I was simply a woman who liked to create and try new things. And who started the idea of ​​cannibalism? I didn't want to eat those babies. So, for the first time ever, I'm going to tell you the true story of Hansel and Gretel. One day I was making an apple pie made of candy at my house. It was made of candy simply because I loved to cook. And please don't think I'm a fat, lazy pig. The cake I was making was for a brunch I was hosting. My guests were arriving any minute and I wanted everything to be perfect, down to the T. Hansel and Gretel's parents, Gwendolyn and Augustus, were dear friends of mine. Unfortunately, however, those two fat, disrespectful, obnoxious children had eaten all their parents' food, and because I was a kind-hearted person, I invited them home. I went out into my garden to pick some fresh fruit when I heard two shrill voices. I immediately recognized two of those voices, they belonged to those two animals that Guendalina and Augusto called children. I really despised them. They were always trying to eat my house and never had good manners. I continued to watch them, not in a pedophile way. Gwendolyn and Augustus were not with… the center of the paper… on purpose, mother!” I swear these kids really were a couple of manipulative sociopaths. They could lie outright! “And I thought we could trust you, Bertha! You'll never hear the end of it! I will get the police here right now and make sure you pay for the horrendous scenes you showed our children!" Gwendolyn was a scary, temperamental woman. I prayed it was just one of her mood swings, but it wasn't. so. Just a few moments later Augustus arrived with the police men, and this brought me charges that I didn't deserve. They sent me to a rehabilitation center because they thought I had a mental cannibalism disorder reason. What's worse is that when the story was published it made me seem like a psychotic person. And since then I've been labeled “The Ugly Old Witch.” That's it.