One of the basic assumptions Bowlby makes in his attachment theory is that physiological or physical threats activate an attachment system, such as the loss of an attachment figure. Attachment triggers hunger, tiredness, failure, loss, threats of failure or loss, and actual failure or loss activates an attachment system. A sense of anxiety or stress occurs when these triggers are set and the individual feels the need to maintain closeness or restore closeness to resolve the individual's stress. According to adult attachment theory, to become an attachment figure an individual must have three functions: be a target for maintaining proximity, have a safe haven in times of need, be a source of comfort, and should have a securebase function . An individual may not have all three of these functions, but when an attachment system is activated the individual acts on one of these functions which relieves anxiety, gives reassurance and attention. Adult attachment theory also explains how proximity is highly necessary when creating an attachment bond. “But each has become sufficiently dependent on the other that separations are now painful. And they begin to use each other as bases of security” (Page 61). This explains how after the romantic phase or form of attachment bonding, even though the two individuals may not be sexually aroused or focused on their partner, they remain together because they are attached. I compare this to Gottman's idea of ​​affection and admiration. How being respectable and admiring a person saves a relationship. Affection and admiration is a concept represented in Gottman's healthy relationship house. A concept of appreciation and respect "the antidote" for contempt in the middle of the paper... This brings me to Gottman's concept of affordances. In comparison, Gottman's concept of offers is based on the idea that happily married couples turn to each other in non-conflictual situations adding to their emotional bank by building positive memories in their relationships. Rather than focusing on daily stress, couples use small attempts to build stability in the relationship, choosing to turn to each other rather than never turning to each other. Gottman has found that increasing emotional reserve and turning toward one another leads to marriage or relationship success. Being aware of small interactions with your partner shows interest and understanding, although they may be confrontational. In my opinion it is similar to the confident person who in times of threat can turn positively to their partner and positively approach the creation of a more lasting relationship.